Underground incident. 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

An incident that happened to Steven Covey on New York's Metro one Sunday morning. Kovi says "I remember the little paradigm shift I felt on a Sunday morning in New York's Metro . The passengers were seated comfortably in their seats. One was reading a newspaper, the other was thinking about something, and the other was closing his eyes, resting. My surroundings were quiet and quiet. Suddenly, a man with the children climbed into the wagon. The children were shouting so loudly that the atmosphere in the wagon was immediately changed.

The man sat next to me on the bench and closed his eyes, not paying attention to what was going on around him. The kids were shouting, running back and forth, throwing something at each other, even snatching passenger papers. It was unbearable. But the man sitting next to me didn't do anything.

The anger could not be hidden. It was impossible to believe that you could be so foolish, to allow your children to have fun, not pay attention to it as if nothing was happening. It was hard not to notice that all the passengers of the car were also angry.

In a nutshell, I finally turned to him and said (in my opinion, quite calm and careful)

- Sir, listen, your children are bothering so many people. Can't you invite them to order?
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The man looked at me as if he had just woken up and didn't understand what was going on and said in a low voice
- Ah, yes, you are right. Maybe we should do something. We come from the hospital where their mother died just an hour ago. My thoughts are confused, and they probably don't find their place after all.

Can you imagine what I felt at that moment? My paradigm shifted. All of a sudden I thought of everything differently and began to think differently, to feel different, to behave differently. I didn't even feel angry.

Now there was no need to control neither my attitude to the man nor my behavior. My heart was full of sympathy for him. My words of sympathy and compassion came to freedom.
- Has your wife died? Ah, sorry, for God's sake. How did that happen? Can I help you with anything?
In one moment everything changed. ”

Many have such a shift in thinking if they are faced with a life-threatening situation, when they immediately see their benefits in a different light or if they are forced to act in a new role for themselves - husband or wife, parent or grandparent, manager or manager.

It becomes evident that in order to make minor changes in our lives, we can improve our attitude and behavior. And if significant, qualitative change is needed, we need to work with our core paradigms.

For this reason, when people around you, or in general, exhibit some negative behavior that has not been characteristic of them before, try to understand the cause of those changes, you or other circumstances, and in that case you will respond fully to their behavior. otherwise

Source Steven Cove's "7 Habits of Highly Effective People"